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What being married to my childhood sweetheart feels like

14. It sounds so young doesn't it?.

But it didn't.. not when we we're that age anyway.

 We felt so grown up - I'd say we felt, 'mature' for our age. I think we've always felt that way.

We still do.

We're 25 now. 25 and half actually. And when it's written down like that it seems such a long time. I suddenly start remembering things that I don't usually think about. I think about the small things that are, I suppose, quite irrelevant but completely relevant at the same time; like eating ice cream out of a cone from the ice cream van, in Adams bedroom on a really hot day.

Why that comes to mind, I don't know. I don't even know if Adam has any recollection of that one tiny moment of time in the somewhat long history of our relationship. But it's special, so special to me that a smile wipes itself across my face when I think about it. And I don't really understand why.

When I look back, like I am right now. There's always one feeling that stands out the absolute most; the feeling of contentment. How lucky I was to spend those years with the person who later became my Husband, the father of my child, the person I run to when the sh*t hits the fan, the person I run to when the day couldn't have gone any better. Basically the person who is literally the other half of who I am.

Those young years aren't the easiest, every single adult now knows that. A teen growing up in a world that they don't really understand. They think they do, gosh, do they think they know. But they don't. And I didn't.

I was naive. Thinking that everyone was genuinely a nice person. When the reality is, that not every one is. There's a lot of bad eggs out there, (as well as a lot of good). But a young me didn't quite understand this as much as I should have.

I wanted a yellow convertible as a car, I wanted a tattoo across my neck (I mean, what?! Seriously Alex?!). I was absolutely going to be a famous actress and would spend hours scribbling down my 'autograph' much to the annoyance of my Mum who I'd blame for not putting me in some sort of magical 'acting school'.

But that was the thing. It was a hard time, finding out who I was. All whilst the exact same was happening to Adam. He was changing, learning. I was changing, learning. We changed so much. From a teen to an adult. Naturally, we changed. Of course we did.

It's almost like when we look back we can't quite believe the things we wanted, the things we thought. I bet everyone that reads this can relate. Because we do, we all change. It's also known as 'growing up'.

We change, mostly, for the better. As adults we take a sigh of relief at not getting that tattoo we so badly wanted in our younger years, or parting with a big wad of cash in exchange for a bright yellow convertible. We laugh at the things we thought we knew and thought we wanted. Because in reality we don't feel that way anymore. Well, I certainly don't.

The thing with childhood sweethearts that go on to marry each other, like Adam and I did, is that whilst everything develops and changes around them, nothing really changes at all.

The feelings I had for Adam at the tender age of 14, are still the same. The exact same. There are extra feelings there now, of course; the feelings I feel for him as Husband, the feelings I feel for him as a Dad to Ethan.

But the 'he's-my-true-love' feelings that I felt from the very beginning are still here. I still look at him the very same way I did when I first ever saw him. I still well up every time I say goodbye to him. I still want to share every part of my lunch with him. I still want to do every single thing I can with him. I still love him as deeply as I did when I was a silly naive fourteen year old, that apparently wasn't so naive after all.

The answer to what being married to my childhood sweetheart feels like, is...
sort of magic that as an adult you wouldn't really believe could exist.







11 comments

  1. Aaw what a gorgeous post Alex. Felt a little teary reading it, it's so sweet. That's a lovely picture of you both too. We've been together 10 years but I was 18 and just out of 6th form when I met my future hubby, so we weren't quite teenagers but I think I knew deep down we'd get married one day. I wonder if you knew you'd get married to each other at 14! xx

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  2. Now we just need to see a lovely photo of your 14 year old selves! :-) beautiful story & so happy for you guys. My mums aunt & uncle met at 14, married at 16 and are still happily married in their 70's. True love is real xxxx

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  3. I totally wanted to be an actress too (still wouldn't mind!) Such a lovely story, so romantic! X

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  4. Such a beautiful post Alex. I completely get this. Although Rich and I weren't childhood sweethearts, I was only 19 when we got together and he had just turned 21, we've been together for 10 years now and have changed SO MUCH in that time. This weekend we went back to our university town, where we first met and fell in love, and it really put all those changes into perspective. If someone had told us back then that in 10 years we'd be revisiting all our old haunts with our two beautiful children, I would never have believed I'd get so lucky. I think it's amazing to get to meet your "one" when you're young, because you grow together and I think when that happens you become so tightly interwoven that you aren't sure where their stories end and yours begin.

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  5. Wow how romantic! Its so nice that you still feel the same, as many people 'grow apart' when they enter 20's, 30's etc It is such a lovely story and made me smile too! You look fab on your wedding day too x Love the dress x

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  6. This is so beautiful. I'm married to my childhood sweetheart, we met when I was 16 and he was 18 and you're right, we are totally different to the people we were then but really nothing has changed at all! I knew right away I would always be with him and we're still going strong 14 years later. I think it's so special and you always look so happy together and well suited, obviously meant to be if you believe in that sort of thing (which I do) Xxx

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  7. What a beautiful beautiful post Alex, and you and Adam sound like a truly lovely couple who have so much shared history and wonderful memories together. Although my husband is not my childhood sweetheart, we met when I was 20 so have now known each other 10 years, I can't imagine my life without him in it now, and I still love thinking about the early days when we were friends and when all our friends used to say that we were going to get married. I never believed it at the time! x

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  8. Hmmm I remember two naughty 14 year olds kissing by the front door. While I stood and scowled!! Ha ha!

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  9. Gorgeous post Alex and you looked utterly stunning on your wedding day (as always). Peter and I married after uni so were young too in that respect but I often catch myself thinking 'wow, who is that gorgeous guy' and it's my husband, love him more each day-think that's what happens when you marry your best friend! Love this x

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  10. Such a sweet post. It annoys me that people put so much of their opinion on the age of another, why it matters I do not know, you are happy and that is all that should matter x
    www.beautyqueenuk.co.uk

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  11. Super Busy Mum14 July 2014 at 20:38

    What a beautiful post Alex. So lovely to hear these sort of stories because up to a few years ago myself, I never would've believe such a love existed either! We are very lucky indeed! x

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