Things that Make me Feel Better when I'm Being Too Hard on Myself

self-care, self help, anxiety, things to make you feel better, self-esteem, confidence,

It doesn't matter how happy your life is, we pretty much all have a tendency to occasionally be a bit hard on ourselves. Be it through a lack of self-esteem or confidence or be it through things like self-comparison or anxiety.

Whenever I feel bad about myself or if I'm having a tough day in general, I know that it can be hard for me to see things straight and to have the right perspective. I can sometimes let something that is in fact pretty small affect me and then I'll go on to let even smaller things get to me even more than they normally would and then those things together will start to spiral and ultimately create something in my mind that seems much bigger and worse than it actually usually is.

And the mind is a powerful old place, the most powerful. And I've realised over that years that perspective is everything - how we look at things changes how we handle them and how we handle things can change our lives. I have a quote that reads, "Change your thoughts and you'll change your world' hanging up in our office and I truly believe in it (though it doesn't always mean that I am winning when it comes to my handling my own thoughts .. sadly!).

We all have our ups and our downs, our good days and our bad days and I guess we all have our little things that make us feel better - family being the most obvious. I know that when I'm feeling a bit down on myself I like to open up and to talk, usually to my Husband who is a very good listener and always helps me see things from a different angle. Sometimes I find that a good cry helps me get whatever it is out of my system and I also like to stop and pause for a second and allow myself a bit of time. Sometimes if I am feeling a bit overwhelmed then I'll try meditating and I find that the Headspace app on my phone seems to be the best for helping me to just stop, pause and to relax a bit.

meditation apps, self help apps, headspace, mindfulness apps,

I also find that writing things down helps and I like to remind myself of the things that we have coming up - my mind always feels better when I know we have something to look forward to and to get excited about. I love watching my old videos back on YouTube, especially the ones of our more special moments and occasions and I love scrolling back through old photographs and thinking about all the amazing memories that we have and all the ones that we have yet to make.

Of course finding something to laugh about always helps and when they're not running rings around me (and sometimes even when they are) my boys never fail to make me smile with all the little things that they do. Plus their laughter is infectious. Sometimes we'll sit and we'll watch funny videos on YouTube.. mostly funny cats videos but they always usually cheer me up if I'm having a bad day!

I have a couple of books that I go to if I am looking for better perspective - One Minute Mindfulness is my absolute favourite, it's the sort of book you can pick up and put down easily, you just need to read a page at a time to feel better or so I find anyway. I also love scrolling through Pinterest and reading empowering quotes, I save any that really resonate with me and will go back to them when I need or want to. And as I've said before, for the moments when I'm not feeling particularly brave about something or if I'm feeling a bit anxious about doing something then I find that Rescue Remedy (available in Boots) helps calm me down a quite a bit and settle any nerves. It's also great because it's the perfect size to slot into my bag for when I'm out and about.

If you read my blog regularly then you'll know I'm a self-confessed crazy cat-lady, so a cuddle with my cats is another thing I do to make me feel better. In fact, any cuddles always brighten my day - I'm definitely a cuddly sort of person. :)

One of the best things that I've found to help me feel better is a bit of fresh air and taking a walk outdoors. I don't know why it is but I find that getting outdoors pretty much always helps me reset and find perspective again. Which is a good thing really because my two boys are at their happiest when they're outdoors too!

So those are some of the things that I do to make me feel a bit better when I'm having 'one of those days' or if I'm being a bit too hard on myself. There's no quick fix but it's the little things. :)

I've shared a video over on my YouTube channel which has more ideas that can help make you feel better and cheer you up. You can find it embedded below or you can see it over on my channel. Please don't forget to subscribe.

What about you? 
  • Are there any self-help/mindfulness books or apps that you love? 
  • What do you find helps you to feel better when you're being a bit hard on yourself? 
Thank you so much for reading. 
Alex xo


  1. Rescue remedy is great for anxious moments! I've been listening to the Chicken Soup For The Soul podcasts and reading some of the Chicken Soup books, it is all SUPER cheesy but I like them - they're good for picking my mood up! Going to the beach helps too, something about the sea calms me! X

  2. I love this post Alex! It's inspired me to look into some mindfulness books and apps as I've heard such great things about them! x