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The Ordinary Moments: The Good Days and the Not So Good Days



I think it's pretty easy to underestimate how challenging being a Mummy of two (or more) is when you're partner isn't around to support you. Especially when your little ones are at the toddler and newborn stage. 

There are the good days where everything seems to go semi or mostly smoothly and then there are the not-so-good days, the ones that are rather overwhelming. I don't think calling them 'bad days' is really the word. I don't think any days with my children are bad, so long as they're fed, watered and healthy, but there certainly are those challenging and overwhelming days.

For me, Friday was one of those days. Logan refused to settle the entire day, continually crying for I really don't know what (I'd tried everything I knew to try), all the while Ethan was left to entertain himself. He'd bring me something over wanting me to play with him, but with Logan in my arms all day trying to soothe him, I had to explain that I couldn't right now and then he'd walk off looking disappointed and then I'd sit there overcome with that far too common and familiar, 'Mummy guilt'. I posted a photo on Instagram (whilst laying on a dirty nappy) of Logan finally asleep on me at ten to five but by five past five he was awake again and crying. He finally fell asleep as Adam walked through the door from work at 10pm.. I'd not even managed to get Ethan in bed at this point. After we got them into bed following a team effort, I went downstairs to tend to my cat who sadly, is very poorly at the moment. I fell into bed around 11pm, I had been looking forward to at least a cup of tea, but I didn't even find a chance for that. So yeah - that was definitely a not-so-good day. 

Today (Saturday) has been better.. we made the cakes that I'd promised Ethan we'd make all day yesterday, just as soon as Logan went to sleep. I sat and played trains with Ethan and we learnt colours together (making piles of different coloured toys). I bathed my boys together - the first time they've shared a bath and then I snapped pictures of them, wrapped up in their towels whilst they laid there sweetly smiling at me. I managed to order the shopping, wear make up, drink a warm cup of tea and even write this blog post. Adam finishes at 4pm today and then we're going to be going to a wedding reception together this evening whilst my sister-in-law babysits the boys. So yeah - you could say that today's been a good day (so far anyway and it would be made a million times better if my cat Shadow would start to feel a little better of course). 

Us parents all go through the not-so-good days, the ones where we think we literally cannot take anymore. But then there's always tomorrow - a new fresh day, one that's probably going to be a thousand times easier. Because, no day as a parent ever really seems to be the same. 




 


13 comments

  1. Those days are definitely testing... but so worth it for the lovely days. Hope you had a good time at the wedding reception and hope your cat's feeling better soon x

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  2. Oh hun.... totally been there. You just feel like you aren't achieving anything you want to, that you are letting everyone down a little bit and that you are a bad person for not feeling 100% happy because you know how lucky you are. On one such day when BG was about 7 or 8 weeks old, Rich walked through our front door and I begged to go to Tesco to pick up orange juice; he said I should have text and he'd have picked some up, but I just needed to escape. I think that may have been the happiest I have ever been to wander the aisles of Tesco.
    A toddler and a newborn is really hard work, and it most definitely can feel overwhelming; sometimes good overwhelming, other times not so good. But I promise it gets easier and easier. x

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  3. It's hard trying to find a balance. I remember feeling so guilty that I wasn't spending the same amount of time as I used to with Z when Miss C was born. You get there though. Some days will be harder than others but it's worth it for the days where you just have the most wonderful time with them. Hope Shadow is feeling better soon!

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  4. Aw lovely Alex, I remember these days well and I still get them now. It can be so hard splitting yourself between two young children with very different needs. I think as long as I fed them and got them to bed, then some days thats ok. I hope you had a lovely time at the wedding and it was good for you both to get out. And hope your cat is better soon too. x

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  5. I had a lot of not so good days when T was small and LP was a demanding not quite two year old. It does get better and easier and I've always said that as long as the kids are still alive at the end of the day I have done my job - even if I'm still in my PJs and close to tears! Hang in there lovely, I hope for many more good days for you x

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  6. I know what you mean. I find my days can be amazing, and then some days where I cannot wait for bedtime! Having twins at least means mine are in the same routine. On tougher days I try not to achieve too much and only focus on the important things. Washing, ironing and complex tasks can wait! You are doing a great job...and wow they are SO cute xx

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  7. It sounds to me like you're doing really great. It is hard work with little ones and I know I found the jump 1-2 really hard because I couldn't figure out how to still be the Mum I was to Kitty when she was one and only. But toddlers are wonderfully forgiving and it's a phase that lasts such a short time and suddenly they've got Mummy and a buddy and life is awesome. Oh and for the really unsettled days I found a sling and some fresh air worked wonders!

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  8. Parenting to two must be so difficult at times, especially when they are so young. Even now (and as a mum to one) I struggle with the hard days and they do still happen, they're just different. I hope you enjoyed your night out and that your cat gets better soon. x

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  9. Oh Alex, sorry to hear about Friday that does sound tough. I hope you had a lovely weekend and I really hope Shadow stars feeling better soon.

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  10. Your boys are absolutely adorable Alex!!
    Bea x
    As Seen By Bea

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  11. Some days, my daughter stretches me so much that I wonder how I would ever cope with another so hats off to any mummas who have more than one child to keep happy. I think the secret it is, focus on the things you have managed to do each day, not the things you haven't.

    Hope your cat is doing OK.

    Jenna at Tinyfootsteps xx

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  12. Being a parent is so much harder than I ever could have imagined, and I imagine it's much tougher with two. But at the same time, the love and brilliance of being a parent makes everything seem a million times better, and after spending a day counting down until bedtime the moment Zach's asleep I find myself missing him. Sending you lots of love as you are one amazing mama, and your boys are just so gorgeous! xx

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